Happy Ending News

Dec 07, 2011

Hi Everyone,

A page full of very naughty stuff:
http://denied4u.tumblr.com/post/10241357315/you-just-know-that-the-women-owning-these

And

Incredible Flying Machine:
http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/6w2vt6/vimeo.com/32408610
Cheaper than you may think available from Scott Hamey in Qld in various sizes:
Scott Hamey <shamey@iflyrc.com.au>

Proposal:
An older couple, both widowed, had been going out for
a while when, urged on by their friends, they decided it
was finally time to discuss marriage. They went out to
dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their
marriage might work. They discussed finances, living
arrangements and so on. Finally, the gentleman
decided it was time to broach the subject of their
physical relationship said, “How do you feel about sex?”
She replied, “I would like it infrequently” He sat quietly
for a moment, adjusted his glasses, leaned over towards
her and whispered, “Is that one word or two?”

The Negative Hairdresser:
A woman is getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome
with her husband. The hairdresser responds with
"Rome? Why would you want to go there? It's crowded
and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome."
"We got a great deal with Continental Airlines," is the reply.
"Continental?" exclaims the hairdresser." That's a terrible
airline. Their planes are so old, their flight attendants are
ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying?"
"We'll be at this exclusive little place called Teste."
"Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks
its gonna be something special but it's really a dump."
"We're going to the Vatican and may get to see the Pope."
"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. You and a million
other people trying to see him. Boy, good luck on this lousy
trip of yours. You're gonna to need it."
A month later, the woman comes in for a hairdo.
The hairdresser asks her about her trip to Rome .
"It was wonderful," explains the woman, "not only were we
on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was
overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food
and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old
steward who waited on me hand and foot… And the hotel
was great! They'd just finished a $5 million remodelling job,
and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too,
were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their
owner's suite at no extra charge!"
"Well," mutters the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but
I know you didn't get to see the Pope."
"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the
Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and
explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors,
and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait,
the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five
minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook
my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me…"
"Oh, really! What'd he say ?"
He said: "Eh! Oo screwed upa you hair?"

Little Johnny:
Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says,
"Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words.
Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable
word?" Little Johnny says, “Mas-tur-bate.” She smiles
and says, “Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful.” Little
Johnny says, “No, Miss, you're thinking of a blow-job."

Little Johnny came running into the house and asked,
"Mommy, can little girls have babies?"
"No," said his mom, "of course not." Little Johnny then
ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends,
"It's okay, we can play that game again!"

Men of Letters:
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
   Winston Churchill
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
   Winston Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with
great pleasure."
   Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a
reader to the dictionary."
   William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?"
   Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
   Moses Hadas
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."

The Test for a CIA Assassin:
The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks,
interviews, and tests were done there were three finalists: two men and one
woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal
door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your instructions,
no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting
in a chair. You have to kill her." The first man said, "You can't be serious. I could
never shoot my wife." The agent replies, "Then you're not the right man for this job."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into
the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears
in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent replies, "You don't have what
it takes. Take your wife and go home." Finally, it was the woman's turn. Only she
was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were
heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.
After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the
woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the
gun was loaded with blanks, so I had to beat him to death with the chair!"

Desert Island:
A man is on a Caribbean cruise until the ship sinks.
He finds himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing,
only bananas and coconuts.
After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most
gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.
In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"
She replies, "I rowed over from the other side of the island where I landed
when my cruise ship sank."
"Amazing, you were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you."
"Oh, this thing?" explains the woman. "I made the boat out of some raw
material I found on the island. The guy is stunned.
"Let's row over to my place," she says.
So, after a short time of rowing, she soon docks the boat at a small wharf.
As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a long
stone walk leading to a tree house. While the woman ties up the rowboat
with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb
struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but
I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?"
"No! No thank you," the man blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another
drop of coconut juice."
"It's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you
like a Tropical Spritz?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man
accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk.
After they exchange their individual survival stories, the woman announces,
"I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take
a shower and shave? There's a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs…"
No longer questioning anything, the man goes upstairs into the bathroom.
There, in the cabinet is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two
shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a
swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What's next?"
When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but some small flowers
on tiny vines, each strategically positioned, she smelled faintly of gardenias.
She then beckons for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she begins
suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've both been out here for many
months. You must have been lonely. When was the last time you played
around? She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing.
"You mean..." he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes,
"You've built a Golf Course as well?"

The winner of the double massage this week is: PURPLE C 11
Winners List
Wednesday, 26th October 2011 B-39 Black
Wednesday, 2nd November 2011 E-38 Purple
Wednesday, 9nd November 2011 A-24 Orange
Wednesday, 16th November 2011 A-31 Orange
Wednesday, 23rd November 2011 B-41 Purple
Wednesday, 30th November 2011 B-10 Blue
Wednesday, 07th December 2011 C-11 Purple

See all the winning results at: http://kingscourt.com.au/win.php
See past emails at: http://kingscourt.com.au/happy-ending-news

Look out for:
Mariko, Japanese very slim and tiny and happy NEW
Megan, English, Statuesque with style and looks and a body to cry for. Mmmm... NEW

Kings Court – Busty List - These are genuine and real:
Busty and shapely: Megan, Amy, Crystal, Lisa, Alicia, Isabelle, Yuki – Japanese, Stephanie
Extra Busty and Shapely: Helena, Bianca (breastacular) Alana, Eve
Tiny Girls Extreme Busty: Josie, Melanie

The Kings Court Massage “Whole List” refreshed on Thursday 7.12.11
Asian ladies are presented in green !!!!
Alana, Attractive, Fun and English Very Very Busty and Friendly Last shift is the 23rd Dec !!
Alicia, mostly days, busty Aussie, likes to wear sexy themed outfits - Affectionate.!
Amber, blonde slim becoming less shy university student in her mid twenties
Amy, Busty and Beautiful Korean, Very young.
Arn, Japanese slightly older and very attentive.
Bianca Lovely girl – very pretty and busty BREASTACULAR!!, exotic looks
Cara, Indonesian, slim shy pretty
Charlotte, Blonde Aussie NEW
Cleo, Thai, tall slim pretty
Crystal, Blonde Aussie few shifts only
Ellen, another sweet Japanese
Eve, Very Busty Brunette, bubbly NEW
Faith, Tall BLACK Marutian
Gina, young blonde German, bubbly personality
Helena, busty DD European redhead
Holly pretty young blonde Aussie Holidays till Dec
Isabelle, Busty DD personable brunette Aussie. Great fun in the spa !!!!
Jessica, Petite brunette Aussie NEW
Josie Busty pretty Asian. Petite yet busty. Very good masseuse
Kathryn, Pretty Blonde Aussie away until Feb 2012
Kelly, Slim dark Indonesian.
Kim, Slim attractive Asian. Quite Beautiful
Kylie, Pretty German incredibly beautiful eyes  Only 9am to 12 noon Wed, Fri and Sat
Lee, Slim beautiful Korean who loves it here. NEW and full of life!!
Lilly, Pretty slender American/Italian very sweet little thing. Holidays till 9th Dec
Lisa, Very busty Indian. This girl has a very nice personality and already very popular.
Mariko, Japanese very slim and tiny and happy NEW
Megan, English, Statuesque with style and looks and a body to cry for. Mmmm... NEW
Melanie, Pretty, bubbly, cheeky and really great tits. Very popular! Restart on Friday!!!
Mya, Energetic and friendly and very attractive Asian Only Mondays now.
Nadia, Pretty Slovakian with good massage. Very popular!
Nina, Very white Indonesian busty smiling and happy Sat and Sun days NEW
Olivia, Slim English blonde.
Rosemarie, Slim Aussie blonde.
Roxy, Slim brunette American.
Sabrina Busty South American NEW
Sandy, Japanese sweet and petite, very nice girl
Samantha, Blonde Aussie tall and shy
Sasha Medium Aussie beautiful brown eyes
Stacey Tall Aussie slim and popular
Valeska, “Snow White” She has very black hair and very white skin. A slim, sexy minx.
Victoria, Tall blonde slim Aussie NEW
Vivian, Japanese very pretty and shapely
Yasmin German/Aussie brunette very pretty and very popular
Yuki, Busty and beautiful Japanese fairly good English ON HOLIDAY

Kings Court: The place where first time customers come to meet first time girls.

Remember: Everyone knows someone who should know about Kings Court.
Some girl who needs a harmless job or some boy who needs to start out on the right track.

A man in Johannesburg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old
friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while the two
practiced shooting beer cans off each other's head.
The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on nuclear
weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating one within city limits.
A convict broke out of jail in Washington D.C., then a few days later
accompanied his girlfriend to her trial for robbery. At lunch, he went out
for a sandwich. She needed to see him, and thus had him paged. Police
officers recognized his name and arrested him as he returned to the
courthouse in a car he had stolen over the lunch hour.
Two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan, refused to hand over
the cash to an intoxicated robber, the man threatened to call the police.
They still refused, so the robber called the police and was arrested.
An unidentified English woman, according to the London Sunday
Express was climbing into the bathtub one afternoon when she
remembered she had left some muffins in the oven. Naked, she dashed
downstairs and was removing the muffins when she heard a noise at the
door. Thinking it was the baker, and knowing he would come in and leave
a loaf of bread on the kitchen table if she didn't answer his knock, the
woman darted into the broom cupboard. A few moments later she heard
the back door open and, to her eternal mortification, the sound of footsteps
coming toward the cupboard. It was the man from the gas company,
coming to read the meter in the cupboard." Oh," stammered the woman,
"I was expecting the baker."
The gas-man blinked, excused himself and departed.

Blonde Problems:
Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....
Helllloooo!!!.....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!
Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....car swamped because soft-top was open.
The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???
Couldn't call 911....."duh".....
there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!!!

Two women were having lunch together, and discussing the merits of
cosmetic surgery.
The first woman said, "I need to be honest with you, I'm getting a boob job."
The second woman responded, "Oh, that's nothing. I'm thinking of
having my asshole bleached!"
"Whoa," replied the first woman. "I just can't picture your hubby as a blonde!"

Trouble and Strife:
My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
while we were in bed. I turned to her and said,
“Do you want to have Sex?”
“No,” she answered.
I then said, “Is that your final answer?”
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying “Yes…”
So I said, “Then I'd like to phone a friend.”

Trouble and Strife:
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion,
and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as
he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, 'Do you know him?'
'Yes,' she sighed,
'He's my old boyfriend... I understand he took to drinking right
after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't
been sober since.'
'My God!' I said, 'Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'

Regards
Big John